| =) |
[08 Sep 2008|08:35pm] |
sorry to tell you this, but if you want to change, you're going to have to do more than bitch behind closed doors.
|
|
| =( |
[26 Jul 2008|05:27pm] |
who am i anymore?
i thought i had it right,
but i was wrong.
soo soo sooooo wrong.
ive never been this wrong.
|
|
| ehh |
[28 Jun 2008|07:09pm] |
right now,
i feel indifferent.
party tonight for alex's 24h birthday,
it should be fun,
as long as alyssa stays by my damn side.
haha.
nooo drunk mess like last time,
i promise not to loose my shoes and cell fone.
=)
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|
| its been awhile. |
[26 Jun 2008|10:24am] |
im not sure why i thought about livejournal today.
maybe was the fact that i haven't had a real friend in awhile..
or maybe im just remanicing.
dunno.
everyone is so preoccupied with their own lives,
their own problems,
their own accomplishments.
but what about me?
i started college,
&&no one is happy for me except my mom.
ive started my line of credit,
but no one seems to care,
unless they need something.
ive said hello to old familiar faces,
but no one cares unless it has to do with them.
wats going on these days?
am i the only one left out?
am i subconcsiouly pushing people away?
or have they pushed me away?
dunno.
im ok these days.
im happy.
im good.
shawn and i had a falling out.
it was miserable.
i was down in the dumps the whole time.
i had never been that depressed.
i held onto him for dear life,
hes all i know anymore,
hes my best friend,
hes my sunshines,
&&most of all,
hes my FIANCE.
he proposed,
&&i kno everyone saw it as a joke,
but its not.
its real.
no, i dont have a huge diamon ring,
i have just a band,
&&thats fine with me.
he'll buy me a different ring when he feels ready.
id marry him 2morro if he asked,
because i know we will be together forever,
&&im ready for forever.
out love is real,
&&its raw,
&&never ending.
yes, we fight,
but id soo much rather ne with him and be upset once in awhile,
then spend my time with anyone else!
friends are another story.
ive fallen out with almost everyone.
ive said this tons of times,
but im over the drama.
&&this time im dead serious.
ive left everyone behind.
i barely talk to anyone anymore.
tiffany, we see eachother once every few weeks.
juarez, leaves in 2 weeks for bootcamp.
&&i have a pyshology class with alyssa.
thats basically all i see or talk to.
my mom and sister are going to texas this weekend.
my mom comes back on sunday,
&&breanna is stayin there till the end of july,
&&ill go up there to bring her home.
i have to go.
i have skool at 12:30.
lator gator.
|
|
| gone. |
[04 Feb 2008|08:22am] |
|
he left today.
he left today,
and won't be home for 3 whole months.
=(
amor omnia vincit.
|
|
| &&he thinks he needs me |
[03 Dec 2007|06:06pm] |
life is good.
life is great.
its never been this good.
every morning i wake up,
hes the first thing on my mind.
&&at night,
hes the last thing i see before i fall asleep.
i knew ever thought love could feel this way.
ive loved before,
but what i feel for him is indecribable and so brand new to me.
i get tingles in my toes,
&&butterflies in my stummy.
he makes me grin non stop.
i wish he knew the way i felt about him.
i love our long talks,
&&how all day long,
we make fun of all the stupid faces we both make,
or the dumbass jokes we crack.
he is the person ive waited 17 years to find,
&&ive found him,
&&im scared shitless to lose him.
sometimes i have these stupid dreams,
about how one day hes going to wake up,
&&move on.
but when i tell him bout my dreams,
he kisses my forhead and tells me he'll never leave me,
&&i believe him.
with all of my being,
i believe him.
ive never felt so strong,
&&excited,
&&eager to wake up everyday.
everything abuot him puts a smile on my face.
even when im mad at him,
all i want to do is hold him and kiss him.
&&he knows that,
so he holds me tight,
no matter how many times i push him away,
he always brings me close,
&&holds onto me the way i want to hold onto him.
hes braver then i am,
thats fer sure.
&&maybe i sound selfish when i tell him to pay attention to me,
but when he looks into my eyes,
&&rubs my cheeks before he kisses me,
my heart melts and for that little moment i could die,
becus it feels like heaven to me.
maybe you think im exaggerating,
but when you find that person who is soo right for you,
in every single way,
&&you know that they were made for you,
you'll understand what im feeling.
then again,
maybe you wont.
becus what we have is soo real,
&&so perfect,
i cant imagine anyone else ever feeling the same way that i do.
real love takes courage,
it takes balls.
it breaks you,
but in the end,
it builds you up.
not to watch you fall like people say,
but it builds you up becus u deserve it.
p.s. i love you.
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